Live music, beer and tubing this week at Panther Island Pavilion

If you like live music, beer, tubing, beer, social media or beer, then there’s nowhere on earth better to spend your Thursday evening than Panther Island Pavilion in Fort Worth for Rockin’ the River. This week, enjoy Sam Riggs followed by Aaron Einhouse with beverages and food for sale on site.

Why every gentleman should watch ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’

The luggage under my eyes is particularly heavy this Monday because I slept about 2.5 hours last night. I wasn’t partying; and I wasn’t doing anything the title of this article may call to mind. In fact, I was all alone in my bed, staring at the ceiling and trying my best to catalog the thoughts racing through my mind. You see, I’m a big movie fan. So much a fan that I can’t visit Target without making a stop at the DVD section. Still, it’s not very often that a movie makes me lie awake at night. This was, without a doubt, my worst recorded case of the Sunday Scaries; and alcohol was not even to blame.

Silver Lightning Moonshine Won the Double Gold, Makes Me Double Thirsty

Haters like to put awards on blast. “Whateverthehell whiskey is so much better than that.” “It’s not even organic.” Shut the hell up. I want this whiskey in my mouth twice as bad now that it’s so decorated.

Press Release

Stephen Gertman, President & Master Distiller at Ascendant Spirits, Inc., announced his distillery won another major award this week.

“We’re delighted our Silver Lightning Moonshine has medaled at one of the most respected spirits competitions in the world – the 2013 New York International Spirits Competition (NYISC).”

Competing against whiskies from all over the world, Silver Lightning Moonshine was selected as one of only seven whiskies to be awarded the highest honor, a Double Gold Medal. Only two other American distilleries won similar awards, one for bourbon and another for a malt whiskey.

“It is a great honor to receive a double gold medal from the NYISC for our Silver Lightning Moonshine. To be the only white whiskey to receive such high marks makes me and my entire team extremely proud of what we have created. This whiskey is made by hand in very small batches with exacting attention to every detail.”

Bar Guys I Hate: The Blind Bartender

Here’s the thing. I appreciate your work. You bust your ass taking caps off Ultras every minute or so. It’s truly God’s work you’re doing.

But let me make one thing clear. Those boobs your eyes are stuck to all night aren’t paying your bills.

Bourbon liqueur is a thing now

I guess if you like bourbon, but don’t actually want to drink bourbon (?), you could do this instead.

Press Release

Durham continues to grow as a major US food destination, so two entrepreneurs chose it to launch Mystic Bourbon Liqueur, a new specialty beverage company there.

Mystic began as a way for company founders Jonathan Blitz and Michael Sinclair to pursue their passion for fine spirits. “We both love bourbon,” said Blitz. Sinclair, a former professional brewer, had discovered a unique and easy-to-drink Scotch liqueur when he was tracing his family’s roots on the coast of Scotland.

What if other brands I love made booze?

After reading about the release of Patagonia beer, which is really just everything I love in a can, I had to stop and wonder, “What if other brands I love made booze?”

Vineyard Vines
Wine, obviously. It tastes like Easter, but is perfectly suitable for drinking year-round. The label would presumably have a micro-pattern of grapes or wine glasses or some completely arbitrary object. But it would be adorable, and let’s face it, everyone buys new wine based on the label anyways.

The North Face
Vodka. Graphic, black and white label probably with a mountain or something on it. It’ll taste exactly like every other vodka you’ve ever had, but will cost more, and you’ll roll your eyes when someone calls you out for buying it. When you order this at a bar, the hipster next to you will almost always turn and ask, “Have you ever even been to Russia?” To which you will not reply because get out of here, hipster!

Guide to Morning Drinking

Some mornings, you just need a drink. No judgment here. Your reasons are your reasons. Could be the first step to hangover recovery, the beginning of a day rage or just a little something to take the edge off a stressful morning.

Today in news for people with expendable income

The folks at Black Button Distilling Company in Rochester, New York, are looking to break a horrible tradition–not making whiskey. They have launched a Kickstarter to raise $20K in order to produce the first barrel of bourbon in Rochester since Prohibition, which we all reflect on as a dark time in America. Those of you who like to get rid of your extra money should go give them some.

True Story: The Time I Fought My Way Out of a Bathroom

There’s a distinct feeling you get when you wake up covered in blood. A million thoughts begin running through your aching noggin. “Am I injured?” “Did I kill someone?” “Do I have all my limbs?” “Did I close my tab?”

If you did, in fact, do something terrible, you begin covering things up. You formulate your alibi. You convince at least two people to back you up without disclosing the details. And you maybe throw some weighted bodies off a bridge. On the other hand, if you did something awesome, even for the most ridiculous reasons, you begin working through the best way to tell that story.

This is about one of those times.

Bar Guys I Hate: The Urinal Talker

There are two types of men in this world–those who talk while using a urinal and those who don’t. I am one who does not.

Generally speaking, the rules of urinal etiquette are simple and finite:

1. You do not use a urinal adjacent to a urinal already being used (exception)
2. You keep your eyes and hands to yourself
3. You do not pull your pants all the way down

There’s not a lot to keep in mind. However, as is often the case, drunk people have little regard for rules. So a guideline about conversation (I call it a guideline because it’s more a stylistic preference than a non-negotiable.) is too frequently overlooked.