How to drink your whiskey

1 Nov

So the other day, I’m at my buddy’s house and as soon as I walk in, he asks if I want a drink (that’s why we’re buddies). So I tell him yeah, and he hands me a glass and points me to the whiskey cabinet (another reason we’re buddies).

After choosing a bottle and getting ready to pour, I realize there’s no ice in the glass. So I start to walk to the fridge and put the glass up to the dispenser when he stops me, “What the hell are you doing?” I usually drink my whiskey on the rocks (unless it’s nasty). “Getting ice,” I say.

He informed me that whiskeys should only be consumed neat; end of story.

We’re still buddies, though markedly less chummy.

The thing is I hear people all the time tell other people how you’re supposed to drink whiskey. Those people suck. As far as I’m concerned, the only way you’re supposed to drink your whiskey is however you fucking want. It’s your whiskey.

Telling someone they’re drinking their whiskey wrong is the rough equivalent of walking into a room and someone saying, “You’re supposed to be wearing a sweater.” Who the hell do you think you are? I’m not wearing a damn sweater. I’m wearing a light jacket. You go put a damn sweater on.

Here’s how you should drink your whiskey:

Neat – No ice, no mixers. Just a glass and some whiskey in it.

On the Rocks – With ice. Or with whiskey stones. If you don’t know what those are, they’re rocks that you freeze and put in your whiskey so it gets cold but isn’t watered down.

Mixed – Some faves are Coke, Sprite, ginger ale or club soda with lime.

Out of the Bottle – Preferred when angry or raging.

You just do you.

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